it’s not the ‘bad influence’ of others.
you’ve got such a good head on your shoulders. you are smarter now than i ever was at your age. so rational – so methodical – in your decision making. you’ve got such a keen sense of right and wrong.
it’s not that you’ll be taken advantage of.
you’re kind, compassionate, tender – but you are no fool. you are capable of recognizing each wolf who wears sheep clothing and you’re learning to set your own boundaries.
it’s not that you aren’t capable.
you are so bright. so intuitive. so intelligent. you were meant for greatness, just because you were born. just because you are here. it already is inside of you. you just need to learn how to nurture yourself in order to bring your greatness to life.
it’s not that you can’t recognize love.
your eyes and heart are so finely tuned to love. you are sweet and sensitive and kind and view the world through the innocence of those beautiful amber eyes of yours. you will recognize love when you see it because it is a reflection of the best parts – the most authentic parts – of you.
it’s not that you’ve lost God.
I don’t ever worry about that. i know He has totally got your back, even when you’ve forgotten He’s there … and especially when you think that He has left you altogether.
what scares me the most,
is that you hate some parts of yourself so deeply.
it’s that you reject your Self in subtle (and not so subtle) ways every day.
it’s that you see yourself as unworthy. disgusting. repulsive. gross.
those of us who have the biggest heart, and the deepest capacity for love are those that often carry the most hurt – the most abandonment – the most self-loathing.
our pain makes our capacity for love even greater. and so we give all of our love – our whole Self – away to every (any) else – to prove how loving and loveable we really are.
what scares me the most
is watching you abandon your beautiful, perfect, divine, pure, Self.
love your Self.
fight for you